|
|
 |
Synopsis
The entire plot is powered by the absurd McGuffin of anomite, stuff having the properties of a virus that affects computers! Virology and computer science cobbled together! Whatever it is resides in a little case that looks suspiciously like the egg case from “Ex Marks the Spot”.
Lovely Lorna the Scorpion woman, hotly pursued by assorted (and nearly indistinguishable; remember, Mason makes them all order their clothes from the same catalogue) GSA, turns the tables by stinging one with her scorpion claw, hidden under under a flap of skin in her wrist! The other agent she subjects to her Pink Pheromone Mist, making him her lust slave. (Already a frightening beginning.)
If you were wanted by a Federal law enforcement agency, would you make frequent forays into public places the way Brennan and Shalimar do, hanging out and playing pool? Can’t Adam buy his kids a pool table so they can amuse themselves without risking capture? Well, no, and if he had, Brennan never ever would have spotted his old partner in crime Tony from “Shock of the New”.
Tony waxes rapturous about his current successful crime career and the fact that he is in love. Brennan is floored.
Isn’t it a stroke of good fortune that GSA radio and data traffic can be decoded in real time! Well, it is, but what is less fortunate is that the kids have only five minutes to intercept the GSA purchase of anomite from Disgruntled Scientist Dr Tork! Imagine, if Shalimar or Brennan made a potty stop prior to going aloft in the Flying Sow, they would never have gotten there in time!
The deal goes wrong, and Lovely Lorna’s Lust slave former GSA Carl Ames is to blame! Shalimar is actually wounded!
Only Lovely Lorna is happy about the way things go, since Ames contacts his old buddy GSA Halloran and offers the McGuff-, er, anomite for five million dollars.
Brennan tracks down Tony and follows him into the Lair of the Scorpion Woman, an astonishingly tacky abode heavy on saturated reds, resembling nightmare décor from the 1970s. Lovely Lorna releases her Pink Pheromone Mist on Brennan, making him her lust-slave as well! (Despite Jesse’s comment about Brennan not being a one-night stand kind of guy, I’m not sure we’ve seen him in other than extremely short term “relationships”.)
After a night of torrid lust (no doubt with quantities of throbbing members) Lovely Lorna emerges from the lust-nest, and finds an Unhappy Tony waiting outside. Tony makes much moan, and Lovely Lorna silences him with her stinger. No more Tony moanings. Brennan emerges from the lust-nest shortly afterward, shirtless and with jeans darn near sliding off of his rump. I suppose this is intended to be titillating, but it’s merely silly. Brennan displays only mild curiosity at the Tony-lump on the floor, and how the body is taken care of is never suggested. Maybe body removal is a service offered by building maintenance.
Brennan personally goes off to chat with Eckhart about selling the anomite, entering the sanctum sanctorum of Mr Humorless Creepy himself. A bizarre exchange follows
It is hard to do this scene complete justice in plain text. This may be the oddest moment of the entire Season 1.
Somewhere in here (does it matter?) Mutant X seize agent Ames, and Adam slops goop on his skin, ‘curing’ him of Lovely Lorna’s Pheromonal Cantrip of Lust. Having worked one miracle cure, Shalimar contrives to give Brennan a good-bye kiss while wearing the ‘cure’ material on her lips.
Now cured of Lovely Lorna’s Pheromonal Snare, Brennan starts whining to her about not liking the way things are going. Detecting that Brennan has either become immune to her pheromone, or always was a pain, Lovely Lorna stings him, and just like Tony, Brennan becomes a lump on the floor. Fortunately, his buddies come along to haul him back to Sanctuary for Adam’s miracle anti-venom cure. Shalimar gets to punch Lovely Lorna.
Lovely Lorna is hauled off to the GSA. Alas, Agent Halloran is not quick enough in applying a subdermal governor, and he, too succumbs to the Dread Pheromonal Potion of Mindless Lust. A mild moment of humor arrives with Eckhart whining:
But alas, his day is about to go further awry; Halloran orders him into the containment chair. Lovely Lorna and Halloran depart with the case of cash. Eckhart is not happy. We are left to wonder if he calls out for help, and if so, will his outcries be heeded or will his employees ignore him for a time, just for fun?
Meanwhile, back at the Zen Hole in the Ground, Adam assures the kids that the anomite is in a safe place. You trust Adam, don’t you? Adam has never misled anyone…
All is well in the world of Mutant X. Mercifully, never again do we hear of Lovely Lorna, Sleaze Extraordinaire.
Think of Lovely Lorna and her venomous stinger-claw the next time you hear the bleat that Genomex mutants are being rounded up ‘just because they’re different’.
Themes
Lust conquers all.
It’s hard to find good help these days.
Plot Holes
Why, except in a moment of perverse whimsy, would anyone want to create a blend of human and scorpion? Scorpions are no darlings of immunology, despite the technobabble Adam reels off. Adam has so much to explain about his work…
And what about Tony? Who cleaned up the Tony-mess?
Creepy Moments of the Episode
Possibly this entire episode may be described as an unrelenting string of creepy moments.
Lovely Lorna Templeton is such an overwhelmingly sleazy woman that one feels unclean merely watching her scenes, coming away with the urge for a quick shower, and soon.
Some moments are creepier than others, however. Oddest and creepiest of all is the exchange between Brennan and Eckhart about love.
Touching Moments
Absolutely none. There were attempts at touching moments, but they failed.
Was It Centric?
Unfortunately, yes. This episode focuses heavily upon Brennan, and not to his advantage. Strutting about with his shirt off and his jeans threatening to depart his hindquarters at any moment do not help. Brennan is supposed to be in thrall to the wicked wiles of Lovely Lorna, but he doesn’t seem to be suffering. Mostly he seems silly, and well, Brennan was never the highest wattage kind of mutant. He also gets to wear another Dumb Hat in this episode, not as Dumb as the knit cap in “Nothing to Fear”, but still you find yourself wishing he’d remove it.
Best Character Award
Lovely Lorna is quite unforgettable, in the same way I will never forget a bowl of Vietnamese fish soup that disagreed with me in a major way twenty years ago.
Best Lines
Nothing really wonderful comes out of this script.
Unexplained Events
What becomes of hapless GS agent Ames after he is ‘cured’ of the effects of Lovely Lorna’s blast of pink pheromone? Does he crawl back to Genomex, pleading pheromone insanity?
Does Brennan ever notice that Tony is no longer among the living, but has become a corpse? How does Lovely Lorna dispose of the body, which must have happened since the place isn’t overrun with flies? Tony was a weasel, and not much of a loss, but after he stops moving and breathing, you’d think Brennan might do a small amount of reflection as to how it came to be that Tony stopped moving and stopped breathing. Nope.
Is Lovely Lorna really very stupid? If you could blast anyone with shocking pink pheromone mist and have them do whatever you told them to do, would you blast one of Eckhart’s lackeys or would you blast Eckhart?
Things We Notice
Lovely Lorna Templeton’s kitchen is the very same as Danielle Hartman’s, redone in Contemporary Bordello Lurid style.
Hapless Dr Tork, Disgruntled Scientist Selling Out for Cash, appears to be wearing the same eyeglass frames as the unlucky Paul Breedlove and lackey of the week agent Delay (“Interface”). They are ugly frames.
Purist Reaction
Very possibly the worst episode of Season 1. Lovely Lorna Templeton’s scorpion claws and shocking pink pheromone mist are just too…much. So is Lovely Lorna and her luridly decorated apartment. This is definitely not the episode to show anyone you’re trying to convince that Season 1 was a good thing.
“Deadly Desire” salvages one-half wadjet for one reason: insight into Eckhart’s character. He may be ruthless, he may scheme in his dreams, but the man has standards: he refuses to shake Brennan’s hand, and delivers one of the great shark-eye glares of Season 1. (‘You expect me to shake that, even with biopolymer and a layer of leather between us? Nothing doing, thug. I would itch for weeks.’). Eckhart probably had his office disinfected after Brennan departed.
(Does anyone doubt that Eckhart keeps an aerosol can of Lysol within easy reach? Maybe the office is equipped to slowly release a mist of disinfectant from the ceiling, the way some horse barns are equipped with fly-zapping mist.)
Dark Mirage
Discussion of this episode
|
|
|
|
|
The Sun Never Sets on PureMX.net
|
|
